Memory Lane

Tomorrow is Lilly's half birthday... 6 months old! Whoever came up with the saying "babies don't keep" wasn't joking! I feel like she was just born. Let's take a trip down memory lane... Grab a snack and something to drink. This post will be long. This is my birth story.

Let me start out by saying there have been three moments in my life where time has stood still. Everything around me seemed to stop and all that mattered was what was happening in that exact moment.
1. When Mike asked me to marry him on August 16, 2008.
2. When I saw that positive pregnancy test the morning of August 5, 2011.
3. When I held my sweet baby girl for the first time on April 4, 2012.

Before I got pregnant I randomly watched this documentary on Netflix called The Business of Being Born. It was all about how more and more mothers are "scheduling" their births for when it is convenient for them and natural births are almost unheard of. It also talked about how an epidural can slow down the birth. If this happens they give you pitocin to speed it back up and then the baby can go into distress and can cause you to have an emergency c-section. FREAKED ME OUT! From that day on I decided I wanted to try and give birth the old fashion way... No meds. My mom birthed 3 kids that way! How bad could it be? The doctors told my petite little mom her body was just built to have babies. She had all of us super fast. I prayed that I would be the same.

Fast forward to the morning of August 5, 2011. I'm standing in the bathroom holding a positive pregnancy test. Mikes in the kitchen eating breakfast. The first thought I had after time started moving again was "oh crap, this baby has to come out of me in 9 months". I stored that thought in the back of my brain and ran into the kitchen to show Mike what we had done. We had made a baby!

After a few doctors appointments we decided to use the midwives at the doctors office. We felt so comfortable with them. I started to tell Mike how I wanted to try and have a natural birth. His response was always the same... "You can totally do that babe! You have such a high pain tolerance." The more he said this and the more I talked about it the more confident I became in myself. My body was designed to do this. So many women have done it. I can do it too.

After attending our birthing class around 32 weeks I was even more ready. I had all of the positions down. I knew how to breathe. I knew the process of labor. It will start out slow and then your contractions will gradually increase in frequency and intensity. You can use the different positions to help with pain. Sometimes your water breaks but most of the time that happens after you are already in labor at the hospital. I had Mike make me a labor playlist on the iPod. Music would help me get through it. I was ready!

Fast forward again to April 3rd 2012. I was 38 weeks pregnant. I had called my mom that morning on the way to work. I was having some cramps here and there but feeling pretty good. I remember my mom sounding excited about my cramps but I totally blew it off. I was so sure I would go over my due date because most first time moms do. I had a doctors appointment that afternoon. Mike and I ate dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings and then we got some yogurt. We ended the night with a nice long "waddle" around the neighborhood. I called my parents around 9:00 to ask them something and the first thing my dad says is "Are you in labor?" Not yet dad!

I woke up and looked at the clock. 2:45 am. I had a bad cramp. I got up for yet another pee break. I got back in the bed and sat up straight. This cramp was really bothering me. Then all of a sudden a huge gush of water rushed out of me. I froze. Did I seriously just pee my pants at 3 in the morning!!? When I finally regain my senses I shook Mike awake and told him that I think my water just broke. In his groggy state he asked me if I was sure. The answer was definitely yes!!

This is the part of the story where I start acting like a crazy person. I was excited and terrified. How could this be happening!? I have 2 weeks to go! I am supposed to clean up this house over spring break which is a week away. Mike has an assignment due tomorrow for grad school. This is not the perfect time!!!! Well, it might have not been the perfect time but it was Lilly's time. This baby was ready to come out!

I called the midwife. She told me to try and get some rest, eat a light breakfast and then come to the hospital around 7am. Rest?? Eat?? My water just broke! How am I supposed to rest and eat? I needed to shave my legs. I needed to pack my bag. Thank the Lord Lilly's bag was packed and ready to go. I laid back down in the bed and tried to rest and time these mild contractions. This is when the you know what hit the fan. This is when we had to throw all of those birthing and labor notes out the window. This is when you realize what they mean when they say that your birthing plan won't always go as planned.

My contractions went from 0 to 60 just like that. They tell you to go to the hospital when the contractions are 5 min. apart. By 3:30 am I was having a stop you dead in your tracks contraction every 2 min. We were running around the house trying to pack and every 2 min. Mike had to come and help me breathe. It was the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I didn't cry but I sure did whine. I wanted to shred the birthing notes into a million little pieces. They infuriated me. How was this supposed to help me!? Nothing could help me! At one point I told Mike that I didn't want to do this. He told me that I didn't have a choice and that Lilly was ready to come and that everything would be ok. He was right. I didn't have a choice. And Lilly was definitely ready to meet us.

We got to the hospital at 5am. I'm pretty sure we got there in record time. In between contractions I told Mike I was scared. What if I was only 2 cm dilated and it already hurt this bad? How could I do this without pain medicine? Even though we had pre registered they somehow lost my paperwork so we had to sit up front and sign some forms before being put in a room. By this point I was in so much pain that I would double over and moan. The only words I could say were Mike and owwww. My poor husband.

We were finally in a room. The nurse came in and checked to see how dilated I was. She said I was 9 cm and we were going to meet our little Lilly in about an hour or so. My jaw fell to the floor. Just 3 short hours ago I was sleeping peacefully in my bed and now I'm about to have a baby. And then a HUGE wave of calmness fell over me. I got in the zone. I was going to have a baby. And all of a sudden the pain was not that bad. My breathing was more focused. I was ready.

I pushed for 3 hours. Mikes job was to give me water. He was good at his job. Between pushes I would stop and tell him it wasn't that bad. And the truth was it really wasn't! I didn't scream. I didn't cry out in pain. Everything was very calm. I was so focused. One more big push and Michelle (our midwife) told me to reach down and grab my baby. I pulled Lilly up to my chest. And once again time stood still.

I didn't get a trophy for having a natural childbirth. What I did get was a healthy 6 lbs 11 ounce perfect baby girl. What more could I ask for?